Teaching toddlers to share is an important part of their social and emotional development. At this age, children are naturally egocentric, so learning to share requires patience, understanding, and consistent guidance. Helping toddlers develop sharing skills lays the foundation for healthy relationships, empathy, and cooperation throughout their lives. Here are some practical and gentle ways to teach toddlers how to share.
Understand Toddler Development and Sharing
Before diving into teaching strategies, it’s important to recognize that toddlers are just beginning to understand the concept of ownership and feelings. Sharing doesn’t come naturally right away, and toddlers may struggle to give up toys or take turns.
Keep in mind:
- Toddlers typically begin to grasp sharing concepts between 18 months and 3 years old
- They may need frequent reminders and support as sharing is a new skill
- Emotional reactions like frustration or jealousy are normal during this learning process
Having realistic expectations helps you stay patient and positive.
Model Sharing Behavior
Toddlers learn a lot by watching adults. Modeling sharing in your own behavior is one of the most effective ways to teach them.
Try to:
- Share your belongings openly with others in front of your toddler
- Use phrases like “I’m sharing this with you because it’s kind to share”
- Narrate sharing moments (“Look, Mommy is sharing her snack with Daddy!”)
- Show kindness and cooperation in daily interactions
When toddlers see sharing in action, they are more likely to imitate it.
Use Simple Language and Praise
Clear and simple language helps toddlers understand what sharing means. Use positive words and praise their efforts.
Examples include:
- “Let’s take turns playing with the truck.”
- “Thank you for sharing your toy with your friend.”
- “Sharing makes everyone happy.”
Celebrate small successes to encourage continued sharing behavior.
Encourage Turn-Taking
Turn-taking is a fundamental part of sharing and is easier for toddlers to grasp. Practice turn-taking during playtime or daily activities.
Ways to promote turn-taking:
- Use timers or count to 10 to signal when it’s someone else’s turn
- Play games that naturally involve taking turns, like rolling a ball back and forth
- Encourage your toddler to ask politely for a turn (“Can I have a turn, please?”)
Reinforce patience and waiting with gentle reminders.
Create Opportunities for Sharing
Setting up playdates or group activities gives toddlers chances to practice sharing in real situations.
Consider:
- Organizing small, supervised playgroups with peers
- Sharing toys that are designed for group play, like building blocks or puzzles
- Playing cooperative games that require teamwork
Provide guidance and step in when conflicts arise to teach problem-solving.
Use Books and Stories about Sharing
Children’s books are a great way to introduce the concept of sharing in an engaging way. Stories allow toddlers to see characters navigating sharing situations and emotions.
Some ideas:
- Read books that highlight sharing and kindness
- Discuss the characters’ feelings and choices after the story
- Encourage your toddler to relate the story to their own experiences
Storytelling helps toddlers build empathy and understand why sharing matters.
Handle Conflicts Calmly
When toddlers fight over toys or refuse to share, it’s an opportunity to teach problem-solving and emotional regulation.
Steps to handle conflicts:
- Stay calm and acknowledge feelings (“I see you’re upset because you want the toy.”)
- Guide toddlers to use words instead of grabbing or yelling
- Suggest alternatives like taking turns or finding a different toy
- Praise cooperative solutions when they happen
Teaching peaceful conflict resolution supports long-term sharing skills.
Be Patient and Consistent
Learning to share is a gradual process that requires ongoing support. Toddlers may need frequent reminders and gentle correction as they develop this skill.
Remember:
- Avoid forcing sharing, which can cause frustration
- Use consistent routines and rules about sharing during playtime
- Celebrate progress, no matter how small
- Adjust expectations based on your child’s age and temperament
With time, patience, and positive reinforcement, toddlers learn to share and enjoy social connections.
Final Thoughts
Teaching toddlers sharing combines understanding their developmental stage, modeling behavior, clear communication, and creating real-life practice opportunities. By guiding them with kindness and patience, you help build essential social skills like empathy, cooperation, and problem-solving. These lessons will serve your child well as they grow and interact with others throughout life.